Life or Something Like It

Rahman And I ...

2010-06-17T05:08:00.000-07:00

The first of the "And I ..." series features one of my all time favourite musicians, some one who deserves all the awards and adulation for his sincerity, passion and humility and not just for being the absolute musical genius he is - AR Rahman. Well I was a kid when this guy broke into the music scene in 1992 with Roja and his music, which was quite unlike the traditional bollywood type, was something that had tremendous influence on me during my growing days. He tried everything in his music - carnatic music, classical western, classical hindi, fusion, trance, techno and what not. Somebody needs to understand and love music to cross the language and musical style barriers and be able to produce gems that you can never forget even if it requires using glass of water in Taal or a continuum fingerboard in Delhi 6. Seems like the legend breathes music. Well if I go speaking about Rahman, I will run out of words pretty soon. So it's better to chalk out my favourite Rahman albums. Mind you, my brother and I have all of Rahman's audio cassettes till Taal inclusive of movies like Chor Chor and Tu Hi Mera Dil which were actually dubbings of his Tamil movies. Well after Taal, the MP3 boom hit us and well cassettes became extinct. Anyways the following listings are his hindi movie albums that I have heard (which means all of it till Raavan and doesn't include his non-hindi compositions or Vande Mataram or Connections etc) and these are in chronological order.

1. Roja ,1992

Why it's on this list?
Because this introduced us to a young prodigy or maybe since some like TIME may actually call it his best. And you can forgive them because the album has some of his best compositions. Minmini's Dil Hai Chota Sa is angelic while SPB and Chitra combined to produce Yeh Haseen Wadiyan which gets a perfect 10 in my book for composition, vocals and picturisation. There were two great versions of Roja Jaaneman sung by SPB and Hariharan although I liked the former better. And that's not all, Rahman managed to squeeze in a patriotic song in the form of Bharat Humko (I sang this one in school during independence day celebrations :) ) and a dance number Rukmani featuring Pop sensations of that time Baba Sehgal and Shweta Shetty.

What it can do without?
Nothing. No messing with this one although I would have preferred someone else singing Rukmani yet it still rocks thanks to the music and chorus though.

My Pick
Dil Hai Chota Sa (somebody might be smiling at this choice) and Yeh Haseen Wadiyan (a perfect ode to Kashmir that once was)

2. Rangeela, 1995

Why it's on this list?
Because RGV decided the movie would be perfect for Rahman's hindi debut and boy, did he deliver !!! Rahman is credited for Asha Bhonsle's comeback and when a legend and a legend to be combine, the result is something as magical as Rangeela Re. And if I am not wrong, this was the first time we heard a boy named Aditya Narayan. Rahman combined with Udit Narayan, the boy's father, for two songs - the playful Yaaron Sunlo Zaraa and the soulful Kya Karen. The album also featured a love ballad Pyaar Yeh featuring Suresh Wadekar and Kavitha Krishnamurty, a stylish fast paced number Mangta Hai Kya introducing as to the voice of Rahman along with Shweta Shetty, a highly sensous number Hai Rama sung masterfully by Hariharan and Swarnalatha and a foot tapping dance piece Spirit of Rangeela. But who would have thought that a song sung by the 62 year old Ashaji picturised on a minimally clad Urmila (three times younger than her) running on a beach towards a lustful Jackie Shroff would become the toast of the town? Tanha Tanha can easily feature in a bests list for Rahman as well as Asha Bhonsle.

What it can do without?
No fiddling with this classic.

My Pick
Tanha Tanha (Brilliant) , Hai Rama (Swarnalatha' voice gives the song the required sexiness) and Kya Karen (Udit Narayan and Aamir Khan make this song unbelievable)

3. Sapnay, 1996

Why it's on this list?
Actually the original movie Minsara Kanavu (Tamil) is much more famous for being the only non Hindi movie starring Kajol. Minsara Kanavu earned Rahman a national award for best music as well as fetching SPB and Chitra best singer awards. Since I have only heard the hindi version's music, I can't compare with the original but there is no denying this is indeed one of Rahman's bests. Awara Bhanwre launched the career of Hema Sardesai and still remains her best song ever. The album also features two rookies during that time who later went on to become stalwarts of the music industry - Shankar Mahadevan teams up with Srinivas and Chitra to set the dance floor for Prabhu Deva in Ooh La La while KK gets to croon the really mischevious Strawberry Ankhen along with Kavita Paudwal. Its routine job for Rahman's favourite SPB who gets to sing Door Na Ja Mujhse which has a nice feel to it. Rahman shows his versatality with the divine hymn sort of Roshan Hui Raat in the mesmerising voice of Anuradha Sriram. But the pick of the lot is the romantic duet Chanda Re sung by Hariharan and Sadhana Sargam which has been picturised beautifully by ace cinematographer and director Rajiv Menon.

What it can do without?
Prabhu Deva's introductory song Teri Meri Baat sung by Abhijeet definitely sounds below the high standards set by the album.

My Pick
Awara Bhanwre (for the music) and Chanda Re (one of my all time favourite romantic songs)

4. Dil Se, 1998

Why it's on this list?
Two words - Chaiya Chaiya. If you remember, this song had become an anthem of sort and will remain SRK's best choreographed song. The song made Sukhwinder Singh an overnight sensation and started his successful collaboration with Rahman. Then we have Lata Mangeshkar singing for the bubbly Preity Zinta in Jiya Jale with MG Sreekumar giving the background vocals in what makes for a sensational hear. Sonu Nigam and Kavita Krishnamurty give voice to some awe inspiring lyrics from Gulzar in Satrangi Re. Rahman takes on the mic to perform the title song, a song that he is still asked to perform as the first song in his concerts. Mesmerising stuff. As if it was not enough, there is Udit Narayan to take you out of this world with E Ajnabee.

What it can do without?
The punjabi version Thaiya Thaiya just didn't appeal to me.

My Pick
Chaiya Chaiya (One word - awesome), E Ajnabee (Udit rocks)

5. Taal, 1999

Why it's on this list?
Because I consider it a masterpiece. Probably the best of his best, this one was an ambitious Subhash Ghai project who is said to have translated Anand Bakshi's lyrics to Rahman so that he could understand the essence of it. Ishq Bina was a soothing rendition with a really catchy tune pumped up by the voices of Sonu Nigam, Anuradha Sriram, Sujatha and Rahman himself singing the chorus lines. Udit Narayan, Sukhwinder and Alka Yagnik team up for the magnificent Taal Se Taal which also had a pulsating western version. One of most soulful songs of Rahman comes up in this album in the form Nahin Samne by Hariharan and Sukhwinder Singh (although it sounds a lot like Jagjit Singh). Its one of those songs you get addicted to after repeated hearings. Asha Bhonsle comes up with a chartbuster in the form of Kahin Aag Lage and Sukhwinder pairs with Alka Yagnik for the intoxicating Ramta Jogi - Aishwarya Rai heating up the screen in both the numbers. Some more variety is added through the Sukhwinder Singh and Alka Yagnik's folkish Kariye Na based on the Raga Kaliyan. There is also a Kavita Krishnamurty's version of Ishq Bina which involves some high voltage orchestra. However the uniqueness of the album lies in the experimentation done by Rahman especially with the two instrumentals - Raga Dance and Beats of Passion , the latter done with long time associate percussionist Sivamani.

What it can do without?
The only song in the album I haven't had more than two hearings - Ni Main Samajh Gayi.

My Pick
All songs highly recommended.

6. Lagaan, 2001

Why it's on this list?
Because whatever fruits were reaped by Slumdog Millionaire should have happened to this album (there were others before but this one did make it to the Oscars). Rahman had never done such a huge scale period film and the expectations were humongous. So Rahman put his best foot forward and gave a score which ranks 44th in the Amazon's all time greatest world music listings. The music was of the highest quality be it a rain song Ghanan Ghanan in the voices of Sukhwinder, Udit Narayan, Alka Yagnik, Shankar Mahadevan, Shaan etc or classical based Radha Kaise sung delightfully by Udit Narayan and Asha Bhonsle. Udit Narayan has two other gem of songs - Mitwa where he combines with Sukhwinder, Srinivas and Alka Yagnik and O Re Chori with Alka Yagnik and Vasundhara Das crooning the english lines. Lata Mangeshkar is the high point of the prayer song O Palanhare ably supported by Udit Narayan and Sadhna Sargam. As usual Rahman keeps the most energetic song for himself and along with Srinivas renders inspiring Chale Chalo. The album also features two instruments - one a waltz piece and the other a theme music Once Upon a Time that along with the theme pieces of Bombay and Swades are his best instrumental compositions.

What it can do without?
None

My Pick
All songs highly recommended.

7. Saathiya, 2002

Why it's on this list?
Because of sheer romance in the music. The album has three heart warming romantic tracks that revel in the brilliance of Rahman and the singers. The best of the three is the title track sung by an enigmatic Sonu Nigam, easily one Sonu's best songs ever. This song still enjoys quite a popularity today as a ringtone. Aye Udi Udi showcases a playful Adnan Sami whose style is the high point of the song. Sadhana Sargam's beautiful voice suits the sweet Chupke Se which gets an instant kick when Murtaza and Qadir Khan humm the chorus part. Rahman then blends classical music with his stylish approach to give Chalka Re with Richa Sharma, Mahalaxmi Iyer and co. sounding really good. Rahman then goes on to give a thumri based number Naina Milaike. Sadhana Sargam and Madhusree do a good job with the song that sounds pretty unlike Rahman but still good. Mera Yaar Milade sung by Rahman himself is one of the songs he can sleep walk through, something we have listened often previously. The surprise pack is Humdum Suniyo Re where the gang of Kunal Ganjawala, KK, Shaan turn a prose kind of desi lyrics into a rap style funky song with some nice techno manipulations by Rahman. Don't know who tried to surprise whom , Gulzar with his lyrics or Rahman with the score but no doubt the result is mindblowing. The song also has a relatively slow version Mangalyam with Srinivas joining the gang.

What it can do without?
Asha Bhonsle and Karthik do a decent job with Chori Pe Chori but the song somehow doesn't sound like Rahman and gets a kind of thumbs down from me.

My Pick
Saathiya (Sonu Nigam at his best), O Humdum (Mindblowing)

8. Rang De Basanti, 2006

Why it's on this list?
Because the music is youthful, inspiring and complements this cult classic of a movie to such a level that you can't separate the movie from the music. No doubt Rahman had previously enthralled the audience with youthful tracks such as Duniya Dilwalon Ki, Boys etc but RDB is the jewel in the crown. The album starts off with Harshdeep Kaur singing the punjabi prayer Ik Onkar which is just a divine start to the album. The title track is a pulsating bhangra number sung by a rocking Daler Mehendi and Chitra. The song is proof enough that music knows no boundaries and regionalities aren't a limitation for a musician. Khalbali sung by Rahman and Mohammed Aslam is fast paced number with sufi feel with some outstanding music arrangements. This is one such albums where Rahman needs to share the credit for brilliance with Prasoon Joshi whose manna like words ooz inspiration. Listen to Rubaroo for instance where Naresh Iyer and Rahman mix playfulness and meaningfulness with amazing style. Coming to the song that became an anthem of sort Paathsala has two versions with Naresh Iyer and Mohammed Aslam crooning some weirdly effective lyrics and then teaming up with Blaaze for rap version. The album also marks the foray of Silk Route singer Mohit Chauhan (he came into prominence with this song and then went to be a Rahman and Pritam regular) whose amazing voice does justice to the well written Khoon Chala. The album features two out-of-the-world slow tracks. Madhushree and Naresh Iyer shine with the romantic Tu Bin Bataye while Lata di shows age cannot erode her voice with Luka Chupi as Rahman suddenly appears to provide the perfect foil to her. All in all sheer magic.

What it can do without?
I can't think of anything :)

My Pick
Queue the songs in a playlist in repeat all mode, enable shuffling, close your eyes and get lost into the world of RDB.

9. Jodha Akbar, 2008

Why it's on this list?
Because a grand movie about one of the most liked Mughal emperor needed a score that probably only Rahman could provide. The grandiose Azeem-O-Shaan performed by Mohd. Aslam and Bonnie Chakraborty sets the tone with awe inspiring performance. The percussion used in the song is too good. Jashn-E-Bahara and In Lamhon Ke have two things in common - some nice lyrics by Javed Akhtar and brilliant vocals with Rahman's protege Javed Ali singing the former and regulars Sonu Nigam and Madhusree doing the honours in the latter. Bela Shinde does a great job with the partly devotional track Man Mohana. But the highlight of the album, is Khwaja Mere Khwaja , a sufi track with words by Kashif and sung brilliantly by Rahman himself. May be its the vocals or the music arrangement but there is something divine about this song. Rahman also packs in two briliant instrumental versions of Khwaja Mere Khwaja and Jashn-E-Bahara as freebies for the audience.

What it can do without?
None

My Pick
Azeem-O-Shaan (Great music arrangement), Jashn-E-Bahara (great lyrics and vocals), Khwaja Mere Khwaja (divine)

10. Delhi 6, 2009

Why it's on this list?
Because many claim it to be Rahman's best and I think an album cannot have any more variety than this. Well it has two devotional numbers - the marvellous sufi piece Arziyan by Javed Ali and Kailash Kher and the aarti Tumre Bhavan Mein with Rekha Bharadwaj and co., a core classical Bhor Bhaye where Shreya Ghosal more than stands up against the likes of the legend Ustad Bade Ghulam Ali Khan, along with the usual romantic and fast paced tracks. Masakali may be weird name even for a pigeon but it sure does magic as Mohit Chauhan shows his class. Rahman teams up with Benny Dayal and Tanvi Shah to give the nice sounding romantic number Rehna Tu but is surprisingly overshadowed by his protege Ash King and Chinmayee in the dreamy track Dil Gira Dafatan. Music is an essential part of the tracks with the former seeing a debut by continum fingerboard by Rahman while the latter has a portion which is reminiscent of Yeh Haseen Wadiyan from Roja. Hey Kaala Bandar has some really intriguing lines sung by Karthik, Naresh Iyer, Srinivas and Co. The album also provides Delhi with its very own anthem, a catchy title track sung brilliantly by Blaaze, Benny Dayal and Tanvi Shah and comprising of some incomprehensible French lines in between which only add to the spectacle. As is the case in all of Rahman's album, the maestro keeps surprising you with atleast one track and here he takes a folk song from central India Genda Phool and adds some nice techno beats to it and abracadabra, I never thought you can do hip hop dance on a rural folk track. Though Rekha Bharadwaj and co. do a great job in the song, its is Rahman's handling of the song that takes the cake.

What it can do without?
Well didn't I say its one of Rahman's best. So no changes.

My Pick
Too many brilliant songs in this, unfair to pick favourite(s).

Well this is my favourite selection. And picking the top 10 was really tough as some great albums like, Swadesh, Bombay, Jaane Tu..., Zubeida missed the cut. Also since I considered the entire album, popular songs like Mustafa Mustafa, Muqabla, Shakalaka Baby etc lost out. Would love to read your comments on this piece.

I am Back...Maybe!!!

2010-06-14T10:45:00.000-07:00

Its been a while since I last wrote something on this blog. More than a year maybe. There were other tasks to attend to or may be I couldn't find anything to write or probably I was simply lazy. Now that I am back, I guess this blog will see some new posts. Right now I am too much fed up with philosophical talks, so don't expect any such preachings to feature here for the time being. May be I will start with my "And I..." series of reviews and favourite listings to fill up the space till I get bored of it. I will probably start with the first of the series about Rahman. Let's see how I fare?

Chapter One - A Bad Dream

2008-05-05T13:29:00.000-07:00

I was still standing near the railway tracks. The train had long since passed me though ,in the distant horizon, I could still see the smoke fly out of its chimney and the sound of its horn still reverberated in my ears. There was nothing I could do now. I had tried to prevent the dog from moving on to the tracks. It didn't pay heed to me and why should it? I wasn't its master. And then the dog's leg somehow got stuck in the rails. I had seen this from a distance and rushed to its rescue. Try as I may, the leg seemed to have glued to the surface. The dog looked at me giving out wailing pleas for help as if thinking a bigger creature like me could get him out of the torture. No doubt I was a bigger and smart creature than him, but I was equally helpless here. If only someone could explain him that evolution and might have ,sometimes, nothing to do with helplessness. And then to make things worse, a train came into the picture. As it happens normally, in times of trouble, the clock ticks faster. The train sped towards the dog. I stepped away from the tracks while dog kept wailing looking alternately at me and the monster coming its way. Within minutes, the train moved past me, dismembering the poor little creature. I couldn't muster enough courage to look at the tracks. I had tried my best but failed.Sometimes it doesn't matter how hard you tried but whether you succeeded or failed.

Remorseful, I was still standing near the railway tracks. The train had long since passed me though , in a distance, I could still see the smoke fly out of its chimney and the sound of its horn still reverberated in my ears.There was nothing I could do now. I thought this feeling would slowly sink down after all I had just witnessed a death. And a death is a death be it a dog. I didn't understand why I was so upset. It was just an accident. And I had no role in it. The dog was supposedly at the wrong place at the wrong time and probably, destined to die a horrible death. Yes, it was indeed horrible death, seeing death coming your way and being helpless. I don't know why, but the mere mention of the word "helpless" stung like a poison arrow in my heart. Was I helpless? I could have done at least something to rescue it else what is the use of having a high IQ or such great strength. And why was I accusing myself all of a sudden? I did try and I am no superhero that I would succeed all the time. It wasn't I who got the dog on the track and moreover it wasn't my dog. I was in this absurd perplexed state of mind - partly guilt ridden , partly escapist.

Some more time passed. I was still standing near the railway tracks. The train had long since passed me and I could no more see the smoke nor remember the sound of its horn. But ,yes , I couldn't forget the wailing dog's last sight. I wanted to move away but somehow now my legs seemed to have got numb. After some effort I managed to whisk myself away from the dreaded site. I kept walking , along the railway tracks, towards the nearby station but felt like being followed by someone. I turned back to find no one. Again I started walking faster. This time I could hear faint footsteps following me. I dared not look back. As I reached the signal post, I could now see the station. I desperately wanted to reach the station since there would be people around and I would at least be saved from my lonely thoughts. But before I could take another step, I again heard that wailing cry I so dreaded. I couldn't prevent myself from looking back only to find the poor dog staring at me. I was so lost in my thoughts that I forgot I was still standing on the tracks. Suddenly the signal changed and the tracks got rearranged making way for a train to enter the station. And in the process, my leg got stuck in them. I panicked and tried to scream but couldn't as I saw the dog vanish in front of me. I couldn't figure out what had just happened. How did the dead dog appear and suddenly disappear? Or could it be that the dog's accident was just a sign of things going to happen to me? I didn't have time to think over this as a steel monster sped in my direction. I tried to close my eyes but my eyelids refused to obey me. I just waited there for the moment to get over. The train came nearer and nearer and there was a bang after which there was darkness everywhere.

My eyes were still open but it was dark outside. I wondered whether I was in heaven or hell? Unfortunately I figured out that I deserved neither of them, so I was back in my world. I was lying on my bed and in spite of the winter, was sweating profusely as one does after having a nightmare. It had all been a bad dream. And now I was all awake, pondering over whatever remnants of the dream. I couldn't understand the meaning or the purpose of the dream. Such things aren't new to me as most of my dreams are incomprehensible. I have a lot of dreams - good ones and bad ones. My life is built on them and I live either of them. Welcome to my world as I wait for one dream to end and another to start.

Statutory Warning

2008-05-05T13:10:00.000-07:00

For some time now, this blog will reflect upon an imaginary story whose contents will be published every day. This story is an effort by the author to make use of his past time and is not based on any real person or events though certain coincidences can be overlooked.

On a Day Like Today

2007-05-12T07:57:00.000-07:00

On a day like Today,
Everything's gonna be fine.
On a day like Today,
I am gonna shine.
On a day like Today,
The worlds gonna be mine.
In search of that day,
My Today is dying.

Torn by unresolved conflicts,
Stranded by never ending pursuits,
Confused by hidden identities,
Perturbed by future's obscurities,
Disheartened by life's verdicts,
Betrayed by uncanny adversities,
Abandoned by the last strains of reputabilities,
Everyday I overcome urges to call it quits.

Love says I don't deserve her,
Success says its too much I am asking for,
Friendship says nobody befriends a loner,
Dreams say they foresee absolute horror,
Future says it all ends here,
The world says I am a selfish monster,
Life says in this battle I am already a loser,
I say this is not me I see in the mirror.

Whats happening around doesn't matter to me,
As I move towards another reality,
Of unthinkable calm tranquility,
And a state of undefinable ecstasy,
Where existence follows another geometry,
And life moves like a pure mystery,
A world where I am my greatest enemy,
Bringing with it a future which only I can see,

On a day like Today,
Everything's gonna be fine.
On a day like Today,
I am gonna shine.
On a day like Today,
The worlds gonna be mine.
I believe I will reach there someday,
Till then I am not gonna stop trying.

P.S.: This post is a tribute to one of my all time classics - Bryan Adam's song of the same name. Though this isn't one of my great pieces, written in a state of I don't know what, after lot of thinking I have put it on the blog for everyone to see. The style used is , unlike my style of writing poems/songs, reminiscent of the hip hop and rap culture, something I have ventured into for the first time and personally have failed big time.

Dance With Me

2007-04-15T13:15:00.000-07:00

Pushing my grievances into the shadow of ignorance,
Filling my heart with unperturbed romance,
With nostalgic memories exuding their sweet fragrance,
To the tunes of uncorrupted happiness I dance.

Encyclopedia Britannica defines it as the movement of the body in a rhythmic way, usually to music and within a given space, for the purpose of expressing an idea or emotion, releasing energy, or simply taking delight in the movement itself. It is the very thing that piloted celebrities such as Fred Astaire, Gene Kelly, Michael Jackson or our home-grown brunch of actors such as Prabhu Deva, Govinda and Hrithik Roshan to the very pinnacle of stardom. It is said to be an inherent form of celebration and expression of joy. Be it Kathak, Bharatnatyam, Ballet or any other form, Dance till date remains one of the talents that is present in all human beings in the crudest form possible and that can be further refined. There is a difference between dance and the art of dance. Dance is a powerful impulse, but the art of dance is that impulse channeled by skillful performers into something that becomes intensely expressive and that may delight the onlooker. So shaking a leg or two at the disco is dance where as being able to carve a story out of gyrations is the art of dance. Well all the people who know me would unanimously agree that I am not the right person to get in touch with if you are interested in dancing even though I can differentiate the Waltz from the Tango. Then what is this piece of undecipherable inventory doing in my blog? I first thought about writing on this topic when I came across a community in Orkut (the web based version of yesteryear's pen pal movement) titled "Dance As if no one is watching". But then I finally wrote this piece because of two reasons. The first one I am not going to say here whereas the second one is that I was deeply influenced by a ballet that I was watching on the Travel and Living channel, which was depicting a sweet legend about a young couple who died protecting their love for each other and the honour of their families.

Dance is one of the most unadulterated form of displaying happiness and exuberance. It is one such act where you loosen your grip over your body and move farther away from the ominous reality chasing you and let an aura of rhythmic chaos take over you. Soulful dancing introduces one to a world of calmness and symmetry that we all dream about but rarely venture into. I love to see people dance. May be thats because I make a terrible dancer or may be because I am just too shy to dance in front of others (though the latter one is now fading away). But I just love to watch others dance. They do it with such a sense of gracefulness and satisfaction that fills my heart. Each step seems to be so meticulously placed. And their smiling faces speak volume of how much they enjoy their dance whether they are dancing well or not. In fact, at the end of the day, what matters is the pleasure derived. Dance is an extremely powerful tool of expression. I have seen good dancers emote through dance. Speaking tonnes through a rhythmic synchronization between the hands, legs, facial expressions, stance and gait and the body as a whole isn't just an art but a skill that can be learnt by many but mastered by few. This is what makes the casual dance different from the practised art form. Dance for the common mass is a way of enjoyment while for the elite its an art of expression. Both of them are equally appealing and heart rendering.

My years of research through abstract philosophy and "People-Watching" (if Bird-Watching can be a passtime, why can't this be?) have lead me to believe that an individual's attitude toward dancing can be an indicative of his nature. Its obviously not the dancing skills but the presence on the dance floor that falls under the perspective of this analysis. A simple glance at the face of the dancer can tell you about his nature from the level of satisfaction he is deriving from his dance. Basically there are two types of people - the ones who dance and the ones who just dance. The ONES WHO DANCE are those who dance freely without any resentments or reservations. They dance as if the world is their dance floor and they are the only ones dancing. They dance without any inhibitions and as a result exude an aura of satisfaction. I have often found these sort of people to be pretty expressive, easy going, broadminded and open hearted. The ONES WHO JUST DANCE are those who dance because they have to. These sort of people are always caught dancing in public glare when what they actually want to move out of the dance floor and just spectate. Such people are normally shy, introverted, self restrictive and less outgoing. Its not that these people cant dance their hearts out but somehow fail to do so in front of an audience. In solitude, these people easily migrate into the first category. However this is not a foolproof way of indentification because there are people who can mask their emotions and expressions and it becomes difficult to conclude what they actually are. But the truth is that dance, easily, is a form of living life. In fact an old Persian proverb correctly highlights that "He who danceth not, knoweth not the ways of life".

So now you know what is the perfect recipe for a 5 minute bliss. Get your friends with you or if you are too shy just lock yourself up in your room. Get the music on, close your eyes and follow your heart. Feel the music flow through your nerves, enter into a state of perfect trance and let your body do the rest of the talking. Dance as if no ones watching you or if you prefer it, dance as if the whole world's dancing with you. So friends, SHOULD WE DANCE???

P.S. : This post has been named after the 1998 movie with the same name starring Vanessa Williams and Chayanne. This post is one of the "long in the making" kinds taking me about a month to complete. Well blogs are normally meant for short and quick posts but somehow I cant manage with FASTFOOD it seems :) Anyways this post is my tribute to the never say die free-spirit of us humans which makes us achieve small doses of happiness every now and them although we always yearn for perfect bliss chasing it throughout our lives.

Blame It On the Men in Blue

2007-03-26T13:50:00.000-07:00

I slept at 4 yesterday. That's 4 AM in the morning. No it wasn't because I had an off day at job the next day. Neither had it anything to do with me being in pursuit of some inconceivable idea on my dear lappy nor had it anything to do with me watching one of those flicks where you can't go to bed until the climax has been revealed. It had to do with something that I love a lot. Not only me, my brother, my roomies, most of my friends and in fact the whole of my country swear by their devotion to it. Its something that flows in the blood of almost all my countrymen ( I don't know about the women but they too are addicted to this). This virus that has plagued me and me comrades is a simple yet time stretching game of CRICKET (pronounced kri-ket).

Its said that whenever a child is born in the country he either learns how to wield the willow or how to hurl the round projectile (Read: BALL) in meandering paths even before learning how to carry his weight on his legs. Cricket is not just a game or a pastime out here but more of a religion and the players no less than the residing deities. Having yielded matchwinners for decades and been crowned world champions once, there is no denying that this craze is rooted on valid judgement and not mere hype. But there is always a thin line between adoration and worship. When you adore someone, you consider him human and fallible and his failures appear as mere stepping stones towards success. But when you worship someone, he becomes comparable to GOD and is certainly infallible. He can never lose and certainly never err. His mistakes, however feeble they may be, dethrone him not only from the Godly status he commands but also the human position he would have otherwise occupied. They now become sinners who should be driven away from the comforts of the middle earth into the fiery oblivions of the underworld. Every individual in my country considers him to be a better player/captain/coach/selector then the actual people who are entrusted with the job. One defeat and the whole country rises in a unison to criticise the eleven and find flaws in all aspects be it batting, bowling, fielding, toss, pitch, weather, team selection and other such blah blahs. With the very next victory, the country roars behind them and hails these fallen heroes as "Dharti Ke Laal" and the media as well as marketing brands pitch behind those whom they had shunned yesterday. Crushed between all these turmoil are the poor cricketers who now are confused as to what they are doing currently and what they are expected to do. Add to this, they have to endorse brands, make public appearances to glorify themselves, get into scandals so that people don't forget them and make as much money on the way. The only thing they forget about is that they have a role to play and a game to immortalise which they are only reminded of during those talked about defeats.

Yesterday we lost again. But this defeat meant that I had no more reason to watch the remaining one month of world cup which had just started a couple of weeks back. We were subdued by two nations belonging to the sub-continent whose combined size, population, GDP, cricketing history gets dwarfed in front of ours. Yet we lost. We had more superstars, more statistical advantage, more odds in our favour, yet we lost. Yesterday was probably the last time I saw my idol (see I told you we idolise our cricketers :) ) playing in a world cup. I have turned dumb ears towards all the ongoing disaster analysis programmes because these have been included only to channelise the TRPs that have been hit by this failure. I needed to do something about this. So I decided to do something. I started blamestorming. From now on anything bad that happens in my life will be blamed on the defeat of my cricket team. So I slept late. Blame it on the men in blue. I woke up late and disgruntled. Blame it on the men in blue. I missed my breakfast. Blame it on the men in blue. My brother woke up with a slight fever. Blame it on the men in blue. My lappy was crawling the web while what it normally does is jogging. Blame it on the men in blue. I didn't like the lunch I had. Blame it on the men in blue. I couldn't watch the TV because it had all the rubbish things going on. Blame it on the men in blue. I just remembered that I had bunked a bit of my office work the previous week. Blame it on the men in blue. And as I am about to finish this piece of worthless script, I am thinking as to why I wasted my time writing about this? Blame it on the men in blue. As an upcoming actor exclaims in a recent to-be-released flick " Woh Kehte hain naa, Jo hota hai Achchey ke liye hota hai" (meaning: Whatever happens, does for a good reason), I say " Galat Kehte hain" (meaning: Wrong). In the meantime, lets keep blaming everything on the men in blue.

P.S.: This post was actually written on the 24th of March, day after India lost to Sri Lanka and hence were ousted from the cricket world cup '07. The post gets its name from the 1984 romantic comedy Blame it On Rio starring Michael Caine and Demi Moore.

Dreamcatcher - Blast from the Past

2007-03-16T02:07:00.000-07:00

This is a poet's rendition to the enigmatic thoughts of a never-say-die philosopher.

Dreams give me wings to fly,
Opportunities so that I can try,
Tears so that I can cry,
Make me do things from which I would normally shy.

They come to me even when I am not asleep,
And have around me an enigmatic grip,
No matter whenever in my life do come obstacles steep,
My dreams help me cross them with a giant leap.

Lurking somewhere in my dreams is a face,
which now and then surfaces with unmatched grace,
So it can all my sorrows embrace,
And before I realise it leaves without a trace.

This world looks so different in my dream,
No chaos, no issue so grim,
Only happiness filled upto the brim,
And good will flowing down the stream.

My dreams give me a reason to live,
The strength so that amidst living corpses I survive,
In realising them I believe,
And making a difference in this world before I leave.

When my dreams turn into reality,
forgotten will be all the emotional hostility,
that were once inflicted by the world's ignominity,
Of my vision and capability.

I am a dreamcatcher,
clinging to my dreams which are so volatile by nature,
Hence every moment of these I got to treasure,
Since they possess a value no metrics can ever measure.

Away from all the worldly strives,
In my dreams I have lived many a lives,
And therein, still, all my passion thrives,
where live my lonely vibes.

P.S. : This post has been named after Lawrence Kasdan's sci-fi movie based on a novel of the same name by Stephen King, starring Morgan Freeman, Tom Sizemore, Thomas Jane and Jason Lee. Dreamcatcher is a Native American object based on a willow hoop, on which is woven a loose net or web and is then decorated with personal and sacred items such as feathers and beads. As legend has it, "Good dreams pass through the center hole to the sleeping person. The bad dreams are trapped in the web, where they perish in the light of dawn." (courtesy: Wikipedia). For those who came in late, this piece of poetry is actually an expansion of the quadruplet, I had injected in the beginning of an article of the same name , long back...

Requiem for a Dream

2006-09-02T08:37:00.000-07:00

"Is life just one never ending 12-12 job ?"

Pardon me for being away from updating this page for a long time. In fact the major reason for my absence was that I am now a salaried person trading my time and skills in lieu of seeing a five digit figure flash on my bank account on the first of every month. When I had started penning down my thoughts on this page, I had been a hot blooded energetic and enthusiastic individual living his dream day by day. And here I am today sitting in this corporate jungle inside an AC room in front of my DELL LCD screen amidst a crowd of software zombies whose lives are ruled by the smell of some green notes, a professional status that makes them counted in the society and an urge to make some practical usage of their national identity and foreign offerings (read: passports and H1B visas) to venture into a land, more than 10 hours behind us. Much of that energy and enthusiasm is missing now, as I surge ahead to synchronise myself with this new found way of life. Yet I am still moving on in the pursuit of my dreams. Meanwhile, my self realisations keep flooding me with questions that are beyond the reasoning of my intellect.

Remember the time we were growing up as kids... Our dreams and needs were pretty childish and a blend of both materialism and innocence. As kids, a chocolate bar, a simple toygun or toycar or even an ice cream was a million dollar bribe for us. We always sought temporary bliss and permanent happiness was an obsolete ideology for us. As times changed and we grew older, we lost our innocence but our materialism and the lust for temporary bliss refused to wither away. If I am not wrong, during our college days when our spirits were high and morale boosted up, we all wanted to grow up faster to get closer to attaining the dreams that had resided in us for long. As we grew older, our attention got diverted towards meeting our daily requirements, earning money, raising a family, paying heed to family responsibilities and as a whole just surviving life and our dreams got slowly and slowly erroded from our memories. And finally as we were rendered immobile by the shroud of senescence, those dreams returned to torment us for betraying them and pushed us into a quicksand of ruefulness. No matter however happy we are, unaccomplished dreams are unforgiving and hurt us the most, decimating our hard-earned happiness.

Coming back to the topic of concern, we belong to that faction of society which believes greatly in legacy and ancestry. There is nothing wrong in it and I am in fact proud of it because it keeps us motivated to perform better and reminds us of our responsibilities towards the society. But sometimes we take it a bit further. The society frames us in such a manner that it becomes mandatory for us to follow the populist norms. Our society is built around such a framework that allows an individual to either tread the path of his antecedents or the way of the common social being. A farmer's descendent is expected to plough his land, a businessman's descendent is expected to carry on with his business, the son of a priest is expected to become a priest while the child of an entertainer/busker is forced to become one like him. I have witnessed umpteen such instances in print, media, gossips and person. Take the case of a teleplay, that I had seen when I was pretty small but could never forget, about a guy who wanted to be a painter but for his father's adamant persuasions ends up as a money minded doctor doing things he had always hated. When he becomes a father himself and his son tops the medical exams but opts out to become a painter, he decides not to let his son bury his dreams like he did and gives him the much needed freedom of choice. In fact if we start looking for instances, be it in movies like Ardhasatya or real life cases from our neighbourhood, there has been a constant trend of others' ideologies prevailing over an individual's. Now check this out... There has always been a surge for availing populist jobs in the country. In the pre 80s, it was lectureshp while in the period starting from the 80s till the mid 90s government jobs became the cynosure of all eyes. And then came the software boom and everyone wanted to relate to it. The prize catch of our times has been a management degree that would make a prince out of any elligible fortunate post graduate. Quite logically, family pressure, peer pressure and social pressure make you fall prey to these glossy obligations because of the fat paychecks associated. Then you start asking everyone what is more important the huge flashy paychecks or living your dream everyday ? No body answers, may be because no body wants to confront reality. I have seen hugely talented people with their hearts in arts, sports, science and other such wide and diverse but uncommon genres, ending up as a normal engineer with a software firm or a doctor with a reputed nursing home or a government official just because they were also good at it and not because they were interested in it. Why is it that some things like quizzing, singing, acting, sports, writing, gaming etc. are appreciated as hobbies but that is the limit upto which they are tolerated? Why is it that people can pay to watch movies, sports games, plays and dance programmes, read books but not let their kids be actors, players, dancers, singers or writers? Why is "out of the box thinking" not appreciated? When will people abandon materialism for satisfaction? All this inspite of the fact that the persons who have made a mark in this world and have brought about radical changes have all been different from the common lot and had followed their dreams.

Times are changing though with more parents allowing their children unearth their vast repository of talents and invest in what we better know as extra-curricular activities. This is not because of letting their children follow their dreams but more because of the big bucks associated with these. Well if things continue the same way, dreams will get lost somewhere in old hindi movie song lyrics and english poetry and life will get more and more mechanical. I have my dreams and am too young to say whether I can achieve them or not. What I can wish for is that the zeal that I have now never ceases and I don't bow down to the pressure of my society, abandoning the very purpose of my existence - my dreams. Because when you lose the purpose of survival, life becomes just another never ending 12-12 job.

P.S. : The title for this article has been taken from a 1978 novel by Hubert Selby, Jr. adapted into a 2000 film of the same name, directed by Darren Aronofsky, and starring Ellen Burstyn, Jennifer Connelly, Marlon Wayans.

A Tale of Meetings and Partings

2006-05-12T09:35:00.000-07:00

"Destiny decides when we meet and situations decide when we part but it is we who decide whether we meet again."

I have been caged in this human form for the past 21 years and what I have really understood is that the very basic thing that separates us from machines and other non living entities is our unique ability to feel and perceive things or what can rather be termed as emotions. As I write this piece, I get reverberating visions of my past or specifically the last quartet that I spent at a place far away from my family and yet amidst another one. These years have taught me lessons so invaluable that I seem to have not only graduated from my college but also from life's classrooms. I still remember when it all started... A tall and lanky guy with big dreams in his eyes and even bigger frustrations in his heart, standing and predicting where the road ahead might lead him. Someone who had lived his entire life under the protective cover of his family, being suddenly exposed to a world where he was on his own. Sounds very much like a teen movie but there I stood in my real life, no strings attached, stepping into my new home - my hostel. Although at the beginning it sounded pretty scary, as time progressed my emotions got the better of me. Not only I had to ward off the ghosts of my past inching me towards a pessimal existence, but also get acquainted with an alien environment and creatures who seemed like me but lived in a world different from mine. Initially it seemed unlikely that the two worlds would ever meet. But the foundation of our liaison was built by time itself. With passage of time, I found myself recovering from those shocks of the past and nurturing good ties with some survivors of those rubbles. And it wasn't long before I figured out that the world outside and its creatures weren't much different from me. They too had their own stories and own regrets. They too were trying to come to terms with life as was I. The occasion necessitated for a camaraderie of sorts and what evolved was a everlasting bondage. I made friends with many and for the first time tried to see life from a direction I had never seen before. That era of friendship helped me endure pain and surge ahead in the eternal race for survival. I started understanding myself better and looking at the beautiful things in life. I figured out the essence of love, the joys of being together, the intricacies of relationships, the grandeur of responsibilities, the satisfaction of helping others, the sanctity in comforting others, the elegance of setting an example for others, the pride in assuming what I was and the beauty of life itself. Its been years since I had last cried but when ever a friend hid his face in my shoulders and sobbed irrepressibly, I felt the pain he was through. I have laughed heartily throughout my life but it can in no way be compared to the laugh I have shared with my friends. Those moments clearly defined the value we had for each other. We stood through those pedestals of time like a band of brothers enjoying together, fighting together, dining together and more importantly surviving the mean world together.

And in a spark the celebration was over. The four years had ended. Our foster home required us no more. We were now supposed to be knocking the doors of the real bad world. We were required to separate from each other and move onto a new frontier in life. We were now on our own relishing control over whatever seemed to be ours. No doubt there lay a hint of satisfaction in all our hearts. We were now the masters of our own life edging towards earning the very first nibbles of our own salary and living the life we had all dreamt of. These were the sole remunerations we were getting at the onset of this farewell. Time might erode those lovely moments we shared but our bondage is here to stay for ever. Those jokes, those pranks, those grudges, those debts, those unspoken words will forever remain imprinted in our memories. May be a couple of years down the lane, we all might be striving harder to make a name for ourselves and in the process might be pitted against one another forgetting those days of thunder we shared. Who knows someday we might even become the reason for the downfall of our own friends with greed, jealousy and contempt playing spoilsport. But even then we will keep telling our future generations of how we met people and what great things have our associations with those people borne. We meet so many people in our life and every time we part we feel sorry about the occasion and then just forget about them. It baffles me why this parting has left so many uncorrupted memories. May be this wasn't just another case of meeting and parting.

As my oculuses are getting flooded in this torrential surge of emotions, I think I have conveyed enough through my words. It was destiny which decided where to send me four years back and it was my graduating out that decided I part from my companions. It is now up to me to decide whether I can meet those wonderful comrades of mine again, for the world is too small and there are too many people in it. So who knows when I might bump into one of those distinguishable gentlemen/ladies. Till then where ever I am, I would forever raise a toast to all you wonderful creatures and all those treasured moments, we shared, for making me what I am worth today.

P.S. : Adhering to my style, the title for this post has been inspired from a Oscar nominated short film Tales of Meeting and Parting.

Confessions Of a Frustrated Mind

2006-04-01T04:38:00.000-08:00

" You can not motivate a frustrated mind "
-My Roomie's Entrepreneurship Notes

I wake up in the morning to find another monotonous day awaiting me. It's the same things I'll be doing today again as I had done yesterday. This stupid life is progressing with a snail's pace with a hue of lacklustre charm and no zing attached to it. The best way to describe my composure as of now would be , frustrated individual. It seems that I am frustrated with every thing around me. I am frustrated at my unexpected outbursts and random mood swings. I am frustrated at my outdated B.Tech curriculum and the mindless teaching attitude of the professors. I am frustrated at my physique, which is often a constant pet peeve against me, that never seems to metamorphose into something preferrable. I am frustrated at my introvertive nature and inability to enjoy and party with others. I am frustrated at the constant gender discriminations at various places that tends to suit either classes depending on the situation. I am extremely fed up with flooding of the saas-bahu soaps and the extra-marital gossips that seem to have become the cynosure of the TV and print media. I am frustrated about the way the Indian cricket and hockey team are playing these days and their inability to perform in crunch pressure games. I am frustrated at the way my superstar Sachin is handling his innings in recent years and at the way the media and the fans have been handling him. I am frustrated at the movies that are being churned out by the Punjab da Puttar , Sunny Deol and his frustrating role selections. I am frustrated at Man U's disappointing finish in the EPL and Champions League. I am frustrated by the way the politicians are looting the nation by conning the common man and I am more frustrated at the way the common man is allowing himself to be conned by acting innocent to all their illegal mannerisms. I am frustrated by the way how Celebrities are losing their dignity by stooping to lower grounds and how the media is making easy money by destroying their personal lives. I am frustrated at the way how channels like IndiaTV have betrayed the purpose of journalism and news making. I am fed up with the news stories that make headlines in the media which are filled with nothing but murder, corruption, rape, deaths, breakups and plain gossips. I am frustrated of losing cricket, Table Tennis and pc game clashes because of stupid errors I commit. I am equally frustrated at being labelled the tag of " Winners at home, Losers outside" in the various quiz competitions owing to my bad away results. I am frustrated with the shroud of bad luck covering me for eternality. I am frustrated at being blamed for every mistake I didn't commit intentionaly. I am frustrated at the way my life is shaping up in entirely unexpected terms with my search for my purpose in life heading towards nowhere. I am frustrated at being so much shy of the other sex. I am frustrated at losing all my adventurous might and courage when it comes to either expressing my love to my sweetheart or conveying my liking to any girl. I am frustrated at always curbing myself from doing things that would really convey the person I am and not the way I am interpreted as.

And with frustration all around me, I have started feeling confused... confused at the very thought of how my future plans would materialise? I am confused about whether a programmer like me who harboured dreams of having his own game development firm, would end up as common software consultant like the million others already working it out like horses only to get lost in the depths of oblivion. Or would I make a mark for myself and stand out amongst the crowd that would make my family, friends and countrymen proud of me. I am confused as to whether whatever I am doing is right or not and what consequences would it bear for me in the future. I am confused as to what everyone around me wants of me; while a bunch of them hail me as their inspiration, the rest of the pack doubt each of my skills and are eager to point out flaws in every deed of mine. I am confused as to whether the values that have been embedded in me since my childhood have really lost their value and hence should I join the others in their race for inconsequential glory by hook or crook. I am even confused at the antics of "My Friend up there" as the negatives seem to be holding an upper hand over the positives in this world thus harming the eternal balance. I am confused as to why every other thing in this world frustrates me and makes me confused. I am fed up with waiting with patience for time to heal my pains while I am bleeding like anything.

Is it just me who's through all of these or are my sufferings just an image of the way life goes on around this part of the ecosystem. May be I might be overreacting to everything that has happened to me till now and may be my mind doesn't want to take any more of this. But why am I breaking down after just 21 years of imprisonment in this mortal body while the whole world has much more horrible, painful and grotesque incidents to talk about. Its the problem with all of us who just lose their present languishing over their sufferings in the past. Most of this post was written by me on one of those not so pleasant mornings when I was highly upset over something and that made my frustrated alter ego to surface. But when I look back at that time now, I rue having wasted a part of my life gaining nothing. At this point what a frustrated mind can confess is that it is very easy to get frustrated and we cant of course stop that but to succumb to our frustration is another thing. Once we succumb to our frustrations we are dead much before our death because we lose the zeal to survive and fight. So instead make frustration an occasional incident rather than a contagious habit and fight off this monster before it grapples you into a state of remorse helplessness.

N.B. - The title for this post has been inspired from George Clooney's Hollywood flick Confessions Of a Dangerous Mind. I am actually posting this article much after I had written it.

Can't Buy Me Love

2006-03-16T11:54:00.000-08:00

"Whom would you choose in love? The person you love or the one who loves you"

Well its been a long time since I last blogged. My mood swings really prevent me from doing certain things I would like to. Most of the time in between this and the previous post was spent initiating my B.Tech project, quizzes and chilling out... During this time a lot of incidents happened that I would have loved to pen down but couldn't. And the topic I choose now, goes against one of the promises I had made earlier that I would never ever write about love again in this blog. But still I decided to carry on. Last Sunday I happened to be browsing through the channels of my idiot box at home and was surprised to find a National Award winning Tamil Movie 'Iyarkai' starring Shaam,Kutti Radhika and Arun Kumar on the antique Doordarshan in the late night(thanks to the subtitles that helped me understand the movie). The story revolves around an innocent Christian girl Nancy(Kutti Radhika) who is waiting for the return of her so called lover who happens to be a Merchant Ship Captain Mukundan(Arun Kumar) for the past three years. While the young girl had been trully smitten by the captain and had insisted not to part with her lover, the captain, on the other side, was a practical fellow who had taken the actions of Nancy as more of an infatuation and had also warned her about it and after repeated requests promised that he would return within a year. As a symbol of love, he had given her a ring and told that if she hadn't found someone else before his return then he would marry her and this would be their wedding ring. But he doesn't return for around 3 years. In the meantime another ship comes into the port town bringing with it a mechanic Marudhu(Shaam) who happens to have taken more than just an interest in Nancy. The two become good friends as Marudhu offers to help Nancy find out the whereabouts of that captain whose name is even unknown to the gullible young girl but when Marudhu expresses his feelings for her, their relationship is blemished as she is not ready to accept anyone else but the captain. As the story progresses Marudhu keeps on trying to force Nancy to forget Mukundan and accept him for which he is even ready to give his life. One day they find out that the captain went missing in a ship tragedy. In the end its time for Marudhu to leave and before that he asks Nancy to select a chit containing either his or captain's name so that he could find out what God's plans are. And he says that this decision could be reversed by only Nancy's decision who upon pressure from family and friends chooses him. However when the wedding is supposed to take place on a Christmas evening, amidst the celebrations the Captain returns. In that moment of happiness everyone rejoices at his return and forgets about Marudhu. Understanding that Nancy had never loved him and had just compromised under pressure, he leaves the town quietly as in the backdrop there are celebrations for the captain and Nancy.

Anyone who watches the movie would really pour his heart out for the unfortunate Marudhu whose love goes in vain and is never reciprocated. But upon sincere analysis, even I found that the ending was justified. Since it was Marudhu who had been madly after Nancy all this time in spite of Nancy having always made it clear that she didn't love him. Moreover would he have been happy in his life with Nancy as she would never have been able to forget the captain, her true and first love. Though I am unaware of the fact whether you fall in love only once in your life or there can be more instances, one thing's for sure she would have felt compelled to be with him just because he had helped her. Moreover there is one thing we tend to forget regarding the captain. Had he not been of a good character, he would not have returned back that too after three years. And he indeed loved this girl, hence he kept his promise. Moreover if Nancy had chosen Marudhu over Mukundan then her three year's wait would have gone fruitless.Whatever may be the case, there is no denying the fact that destiny has a great control over our lives and we are waging an unrelentless war against it trying to achieve what we want while fate intervenes making us get whatever is destined for us. As in this case, the chit contained the name of the captain, although only the father at the church knew about it and it was destiny that rescued Mukundan from the clutches of death because he had to keep his promise. Although this was just another highly complicated love triangle, the real life Nancy would have had a very
difficult job at hand, since both the men had become part of life and giving either would have meant losing a part of her.

Coming back to the question I asked at the starting of this writeup. Personally I would choose the person I love because she is the only one whose love I can honestly reciprocate. Love doesn't have any logic so don't go searching around for reasons as to why you love someone because if you find the reason then its not love. Love understands only the language of love and sacrifice and there is no space for things like compromise, debt etc. Love cannot be forced onto, as Marudhu tried,its borne with time and affection. Definitely you can't buy me love, its not for sale... its only for offer from the innermost cores of your lover's heart, free of cost.

P.S. : Can't Buy Me Love is a famous hit track by the Beatles written by Paul McCartney as well as a famous teen hollywood movie starring Amanda Petersen and Patrick Dempsey.

The Story of US

2006-01-29T05:25:00.000-08:00

"There is no US in this . "
Max Payne in MAX PAYNE 2 - THE FALL OF MAX PAYNE

In the journey of a lifetime, people say, it is always mandatory to have the company of someone who would help you in traveling the distance, be it your family or a close friend or the love of your life. This partner boosts you up when you are feeling low, comforts you in your sorrow and rejoices with you in your happiness, makes you feel your worth in this mad mad world and accompanies you through the ages. However I find myself castaway from this great virtue of companionship. I have been a selfish person throughout my life who has never thought about anything else but himself. I have always seen the world through my eyes and have disregarded the views of others in all respects. Through the years I have spent as myself, I have become such a stingy individual that my perceptions have become so much individualistic and egoistic that I have become incompatible with every other being in this world. Hence for the sake of their betterment and mine, it is justifiable that I tread the path alone.

My Family has not only been my greatest gift, my most essential weakness, my indefinite source of inspiration and strength but also the cause of whatever I am today. But in spite of all this, I won't be able to be with my family forever. Although I will never ever do anything that would bring shame to the name of my family and I know that one day I would reach such heights that my family will be proud of me, I feel I cannot always stick to my family because as a member of my family, my self-centered activities would do more harm than good to the peace of the homely environment. My family might misunderstand my withdrawal and aloofness and build a highly wrong image of mine but I am ready to pay this price in return of my family enjoying a happy and peaceful life.

My Friends have been a great means of sustenance for me who have often lifted me from the horrific world of reality to an enchanting globe of enjoyment. They have shared my dreams, boosted me up when I was down, encouraged and supported me in my work and have had faith in me even when everything seemed to be going against me. But I have given them nothing in return. A fake sense of togetherness, always concealed the real me from them, always tried to protect my interests even when I was helping them and worst of all, have never shared my sorrows and problems with them. I am not sure whether the way I have lost contact with my past friends, I would desert the ones I have now but one thing I am sure about is that neither can I repay them for whatever they have done for me nor can I include them in my journey of life as a permanent member.

My love for my sweetheart has been an absolute gift in disguise for me. It has taught me the lessons of sacrifice and affection that had for long eluded me. But the crossroads where I stand now prevent me from even expressing my love for her. Though she might never know it, she had come pretty close to becoming the US I had for long avoided. Moreover the relationships, that I have seen in others' lives, and the following break-ups have imparted such a dark frame in my imagery that I am afraid of building a relationship. The way life is shaping up for me, I presume love and relationships will remain a mirage for me in my future.

The only thing that still propels me through all the hardships, disappointments and frustrations is the will to achieve my dreams and fulfill my objectives why I am down here. This zeal convinces me that one day I will reach great heights and everyone who has been with me at any juncture of my life will be proud of that association and feel happy for me. To the world I might someday appear as one who has excelled and succeeded in the materialistic surge for superiority but only I will know what a big failure I have been on the personal front. The ones whom I love the most have been the ones who have hurt me the most and the tragedy is that in spite of all this, I can't see them get hurt. I will always pray for their well being and happiness even though knowingly/unknowingly they have shaped me into this monster. I am not worried about how the world or my closed ones interpret me tomorrow but I am convinced about one thing that my life with all its goodies and tortures are mine and I will share it with none. I came to being into this world alone and I will handle my existence alone before I leave it all alone...

Dreamcatcher

2006-01-16T23:54:00.000-08:00

"Dreams give me wings to fly,
Opportunities so that I can try,
Tears so that I can cry,
Makes me do things from which I would normally shy.
Away from all the worldly strives,
In my dreams I have lived many a lives,
And therein, still, all my passion thrives,
where live my lonely vibes. "

In this world of harsh realities, dreams are the only way out. It is the only place of existence which is quite unlike the materialism we persist in, a place where all the ground realities are falsified, where all the laws of nature are defied, where all your wishes are fulfilled and nightmares come true. Imagine what would have happened to mankind if we humans had been deprived of this fantastic property! Many an inventions have been conceived in dreams, many an epics unfurled in them, many a symphonies been composed in them and many an aspirations been nurtured in them. Dreams are supposed be a sort of image sequencing done by the various facts known to you and the wide array of thoughts circling your mind even when you seem to be thoughtless. Well that would be the non-scientific explanation of dreams... I have nurtured many a dreams and personally feel unless you dream, you can't envision your goal. Not only the vision but also the persisting motivation to excel is provided by dreams. But the tragedy remains that seldom do all those dreams materialise. There is nothing more devastating than letting your dreams vanish into deprecating clouds of a myriad black hole and that too when the fault doesn't lie with you, you never lost sight of your dreams but destiny had other plans for you. I had dreamt of love, when I awoke I found myself receding away from it. I had dreamt of touching new frontiers and letting people know my capabilities, when I awoke I found my plans eroded. I had a dreamt of an aura of peace in my life, when I awoke I found a glutinous hue of discord surrounding me. I had dreamt of an ambition that I really wanted, when I awoke I found myself moving towards a mirage the world demanded. I had dreamt of a perfect world for myself, when I awoke I found myself living in a world that was crumbling every second of it.

Yet I haven't stopped dreaming... I'll never. Without my dreams, I lose the zeal for sustenance and I am reduced to someone I don't know. My dreams might have tumbled but I am not the one to give up. I know one day my dreams will decide the future of tomorrow. I am living for it. I am dreaming for it...

Seven things that embarrass me

2006-01-10T02:49:00.000-08:00

Well the following are the most voted embarrassing moments that were found during a recent poll taken by Champ. However only one person voted ( who else but Champ himself !!! ) and these are his personal selections. So here we go :-

7. I suddenly go on to the microphone and am about to deliver a very energetic speech when I suddenly figure out that I can't remember what I have to say and about hundreds of people are enthusiastically staring at me.

6. People taking my photographs or recording on me on camera and suddenly all the attention of the crowd is on me(and people say I am photogenic !!!).

5. Finding myself in a crowd of which I know none and I have to stay there for some hours and the only thing I can do is stare at other people who , on the other hand, are exchanging weird glances at me as if I am an alien.

4. I meet a person on the road, assume him to be a 'long time no see' friend of mine and start talking to him, untill soon I find out that I have got the wrong person. The embarassment adds up when that person turns out to be another person whom I really know.

3. I meet a relative in a party and can't recall his/her name and suddenly he/she asks me, " Do you recognise me? Tell Who I am? ". I am tongue-tied as I can't figure out who he/she is but have already given an impression that I know him/her.

2. Waiting for the Traffic light turn green while being stranded in a traffic jam and then the light goes green but... My bike won't start and hoards of horn sounds behind me just remind me that I am blocking the way of other vehicles.

1. I am caught by a family member while I am doing something uncensored (I wouldn't like to specify what uncensored means !!!)

N.B. : Let me assure you my personal preferences have nothing to do with the lines "Seven things" nor am I trying to make a spoof of Stephen Covey ( aka the author of Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" ). Its only that I ran out of more embarrassing ideas, so do expect a sequel and maybe after that another prequel to that sequel...

Borne Identity

2005-12-26T22:45:00.000-08:00

" Some People are born with an identity, others have borne one".

Who am I? This three worded question is one of the toughest ones for me to answer. I have been searching for my identity since the day I understood the basic underlying truth of the world that life is nothing but a race for survival. Identity is the only thing that sets us apart from animals, no matter in whatever ways may we be related to them. It is the only thing that sustains my growth as an individual in this crowded universe and sets me apart from every other entity. I have always tried to establish an identity of my own, that would truly speak of the real me. It's not been that easy though because life does not always propagate you to display the real 'you' to the outside world. These inhibitions are often the call of the time and situation, two essential elements that lay constraints around you. Also sometimes it may so happen that you don't want the world to know why you do certain things. These are the times you need to disguise yourself as someone else. And it is these disguises that veil our real identities. When I retrospect back into my past, I find that I have only at certain junctures shown the world my true identity while most of the times the mask I put on (which the world thinks to be me) is something that even I find a stranger. While there are numerous reasons for this masquerade, it is difficult to enumerate why I have been unable to shed this veil. No doubt this veil has become my identity to the outer world. What is much more of a concern for me is that I seem to have lost the skills I once possessed in handling my disguises as I find myself inquiring about my real identity. The real me seems to have somewhere lost itself in the shrouds of my cloaked identity.

Although as a 21 year old I haven't seen the whole world, yet my experiences have taught me a lot about the how all these work. The various stages of our life have a lot of impact on our growing up. In our pre-teen years we always try to emulate other people, who have influenced us. During the teens and early twenties, when we are suddenly thrusted onto the threshold of worldly existence, we start looking out for carving an image for ourselves. This leads to an egoistic surge for the making of the 'I' different from others that could be easily recognised amongst a crowd. This 'I' predominates all the decisions and choices we make. Later on we start understanding our responsibilities and our family comes into the forefront but the 'I' always stays at the back of our mind. These quite often lead to what we call a duel between us and the whole world termed, pretty aptly, as identity crisis. Often the identity that we carve for ourselves is not the persona envisioned by us. Well indeed some people are born with an identity that they are never able to shed and sometimes don't want to shed it and try to accumulate as much as they can on the basis of these identities. As for myself, I have been building my own for several years and though I seem to have lost myself in the confused whirlpool of the quest for the real me, I believe one day the whole world will actually figure out who I really am. Truly enough, some people are born with an identity, while others have to borne one.

In the Name of Love ...

2005-12-23T22:42:00.000-08:00

Love :
strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties ; the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration and unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another

What can you say about a feeling when the world seems to you as a distant reality and you start living in a world of dreams? An emotion that transforms even the staunch pessimist into a optimistic soul who sees a ray of hope in every action done upon him. You become nobler by virtues, kinder at heart and caring in nature. I haven't figured it out as to what it as, yet, but my friends say that these are signs of love, so let us assume that this is love. Love is indeed a very pristine, sweet and binding experience that is at times tender and at times tough. Love gives you a being of togetherness that helps you reinvent yourself. Love is a source of strength and support. Certainly love is not the aim of life but a very integral part of it that, however we might ignore, will anyhow find a way into our lives. I have been in love and although a sad ending is in sight, I don't regret being in love. Being in love has helped me find myself, given me a sense of maturity and responsibility, helped me sort out my priorities and most importantly restored my faith in myself. I had always assumed that I would easily avoid being in love, which I earlier considered a distraction, but Cupid is definitely a sharpshooter and he didn't miss me either. Although the way my love story is shaping up unless a miracle happens, I would never be able to express my love to my sweetheart (for her goodwill though) but then I had never made a deal that I should get love in return of mine. In spite of my current stand in love, which you might consider as a result of my craziness or foolery, I don't have any complaints because my love for my sweetheart has given me enough strength to get me through a very bad phase although she might never know this. I think these words and feelings are better understood by those who have been through this. My advice to all will be that you should be in love at least once in your life so that you understand its essence and magnanimity. And no matter how much you try to ignore it or get desperate with it, love will catch you unaware and surprise you. Love is dictated by Mother Nature and is something you cannot escape nor can be thrusted upon. Love will happen when it has to and when you least expect it to.

Love has been a very favourite topical for many a scripts but I find the true essence of love in very few of those. I, certainly, can't comprehend why it is said that all is fair in love because I think there are some rules to this. You can't betray your sweetheart for others nor can you give up everything else for your sweetheart. I have seen people giving up their families for love and being hailed as soldiers of love. I have read about people killing for love. Is it love?Love never teaches these. Love can never get you far from anyone because it's job is to bind. Love binds all of us together then how can it be love if you betray one for the other. Love preaches of a perfect balance in life. Love gives you the strength to defend not attack others. Love is not just about living and dying together but being together forever at heart even though not physically and uniting others with the power of our love. Unlike all good things though, I feel, true love doesn't always have a happy ending and the essence of true love is loving one irrespective of what the climax of the story will be.

A lot been said about love (maybe this is my last treatise on love), my views might differ from that of others but still all of us have done what we have done in love , all in the name of love ...

Bloggers ahoy !!!

2005-12-20T21:34:00.000-08:00

Welcome to the world of e-writings !!! A highly innovative galaxy of inconsequential collection of both pragmatic as well as theoritical compositions. If you are still perplexed at what I am speaking about, then let me get to the point straightaway. The point for dissection today is the advent of the weblogs or the thing that we know in a better way as blogs. Blogs have so inundated into the digital web that they have found their way into the dictionaries, implying penning down articles on a website totally dedicated to these. The immensely popular Indian portal Rediff.com has rated e-blogs as one of the top ten emerging trends of 2005 ( read http://specials.rediff.com/yearend/2005/dec/20yend5.htm and http://www.rediff.com/getahead/2005/sep/22blog.htm). The success of blogging is no mystery. Although it came to being as an instrument for noting important stats for personal use, blogs have metamorphosised into means of sharing personal experiences, expressing personal views, gossip engines etc. I was even stunned to see certain blogs being used by budding authors for getting exposure to their latest works by posting excerpts from these on their blogs. Blogs have been a boon for people like me who find it much easier to express their feelings and views in writings than through the word of mouth. Although I took up blogging to get a face to my suppressed views and have tried to make my blog as private as possible by making it accessible to restricted elite group, the accessibility to blogs is user-customisable i.e., you can make your blog a secret diary for your personal viewing only or a public repository. The most amusing thing about this is that you are reading this article about blogging in a blog !!! That speaks a lot about how blogs have entered in your life. With a number of people around me getting into this activity (even people whom I have never dreamt of writing), one thing's for sure blogging is here to stay.

Destiny's Child ...

2005-12-08T06:35:00.000-08:00

Destiny - des·ti·ny - (dst-n) n. :
The power or agency thought to predetermine events

No doubt the gigantic world has submitted itself at the mighty strength of the human race but there is an element that no living creature has ever enslaved. It is this very thing that astonishes us every now and then reducing our enormous capabilities to mere facets of ornamentation. It is this very thing that has dictated the out comings of billions of years of human beings' existence. Call it Destiny, Fate, Fortune or Luck ... the power underneath remains the same. Man has so long tried to evade it but to no avail. In simple words, Destiny holds the keys to the future. Mankind has always searched for clues to know the secret of this entity and no matter whatever amount of research has been done to predict its path, destiny remains the mysterious stranger who decides the eventual consequence of any event. Myths have always floated around about how destiny works. Some claim that the world we live in is a precompiled script of the Almighty and as the plot moves on and the future unfurls, we call it destiny. Another faction claims that we are all part of a chess match between the Good and the Bad, and destiny is nothing but a move made by any of the either sides. The Scientific Community has deep belief that destiny works on Newton's third Law - " To every action there is an equal and opposite reaction ". Hence as we sow, so we reap i.e., whatever happens in the future is because of our actions in the present. The Religious Community, which believes that man is reborn again and again till the spiritual attainment of Moksha, is of the view that destiny is an agent of God which keeps track of all the deeds of a human in its past birth and implements the results of his present actions on the basis of this. Whatever may be the views on this there can be only one conclusion - there is no way escaping our future and our fate for we are all Destiny's Children.

My Advice :
Simple... There is no point in toiling over something where we don't have any control. What we can do is our duty i.e., do what we have to without worrying about what future holds for us. At least then if we fail, we can be happy that we tried our best but destiny had other plans for us, rather not at all trying and leaving everything at fate's mercy.

Love's Labour Lost...

2005-11-18T02:24:00.000-08:00

“The worst situation in love is when you fall in love with someone who doesn’t know you exist."

I have been writing a bit too much on love because I am trying to understand the intricacies involved. Why isn't everyone successful in love and why do break-ups occur in relationships? I don't know the answers to these. First things first... The world doesn't recognize silent lovers. Obviously, how can it when it doesn't know the person? So those people get lost somewhere in the pages of history. And there are indeed many lovers who succumb to there shy nature and in spite of the fact that their love is true and they could have made a great partner, have a sad and disappointing ending to their love life. But let’s spare a thought for those who keep the flame of their love alive even after knowing that the very person they are so much in love with is not aware of his existence. Sounds much like a movie script but then aren't movies based on real life incidents? The problem with people is that everyone falls in love at some point of time but few really understand the meaning. Love is not a business deal where you expect the other one to reciprocate. Love is more of a feeling where you care for the other one irrespective of what the other one feels. There is no such thing called revenge or domination in love and ego is one of the biggest spoilers in love. Whatever attitudes might be propagated by movies, I personally feel that love is so pure and innocent that the only thing you care for is that your partner is never hurt. Hence things like going against family and forgetting your close ones is never advocated by love. In fact love is such a feeling you start seeing the good things in life and try to balance everything in life. Lastly a word for the persons who have sacrificed in love - they are the ones who have understood the depth of love. They have given more importance to their partner's feelings and happiness. So it doesn't really matter to them if we call their cases as love's labour lost...

Down With Love...

2005-11-16T11:32:00.000-08:00

This piece of wisdom coming from the same person who had baffled you all with " The Magic of Love or is it?” might be a shocker for you but this means two things. Either this blogger has been metamorphosised by time or he has caught the bug. It's for you to guess but the views represented below are an extension of what I had earlier ascertained.

"The Magic of Love or is it?" doesn't end there, it just claims to highlight 'a good thing gone wrong' notion about love. I have just remarked at how people forget their priorities while placing all their attention on the bliss of love. Love isn't bad or forbidden; it’s just that there is a line that should not be crossed. Love is not about just being together, it’s about understanding each other. True love has such enormous power that both opposites and like minded people gel together. In love, physical closeness or distance is of least importance. No matter where are you, love binds you both together. As people refer to courage and fear as its all in the mind, I would say with reference to love that it’s all in the heart. Love for me is not just a moment of excitement but a long lasting feeling of togetherness. But what I find toughest in love is conveying the other that you love her. It is extremely tough at least for a shy person like me. May be this has been the reason why I have been unsuccessful in love and may be myself being a bit too choosy also has its percussions on it. Well whatever the case may be I strongly believe that keeping the relationship alive is as important as making sure there is one. Well then love is such a beautiful feeling you never know when you are down with love...

And I Chose Family...

2005-11-15T01:17:00.000-08:00

It didn't take me much time to come to a conclusion. After all, all I needed was to put myself in a crunch situation where I have to choose either my career or my family. And I found that however important be my career to me I will always return back to my family. No doubts about that. And do I have any regrets. I may have some ... but those are nothing in front of the happiness that I derive from my family - however small and irrelevant they may be. I personally believe if one can not contribute towards the well being of his family, he can never contribute towards the upliftment and advancement of mankind as a whole. Career is important to me and I know that I am here for fulfilling something great but I won't be able to achieve it without the support of my family and the love of my dear ones. May be it was just an identity crisis that forced me ask this trivial question but nevertheless I was able to understand myself better and regain my self-respect. The only thing that hurts me is that I had to ponder over it for such a long time inspite of the fact that the answer lay so close to my heart.

When Priorities Collide ...

2005-11-14T09:19:00.000-08:00

"In the battle of priorities/choices, it is always you who loses."

Among the many dilemmas that man faces, one is the age long battle of priorities between family and career. Two highly important facets of human life and always at loggerheads with each other. Since both require absolute dedication it is difficult to divide time between the two. What makes it much more difficult is that both of these are two of the most important components of one's life. Now lets judge the either side’s arguments.

Family should be the obvious choice for it is where you are supposed to return back. While career can provide you with fame and other materialistic goodies, it can never bring you the pure happiness that your family gives you. However rich or famous may you be, at the end of the day it is always the family you turn towards in search of untampered love and care. Moreover it is one's duty to repay back to your family all that has been done for you. And overlooking your family for your career is utter betrayal.

Career ought to be the obvious choice. Something else comes before your family, that is the mankind. All of us have some responsibilities towards mankind. We need to devote ourselves to our work so that we can be responsible for the advancements of tomorrow that would make life easier for the generations to come. And family is a major hindrance towards such devotion because it prevents you from taking risks - which is the basis of all great achievements.

However you might argue, it is very difficult to choose one of the two. Take the case of most of the great people in history, their private lives had been highly unsuccessful. And people who have had very good personal lives have rarely contributed to the mankind. Whatever you may choose (because you have to one day), ultimately you will be the loser because you will have to give up one thing or the other.

A Choice we can't make...

2005-09-02T18:45:00.000-07:00

" Of words unspoken and promises unkept,
Of dreams unfulfilled and tasks unfinished,
Of all the successes achieved and all the losses incurred,
My search for my purpose in life has spawned more questions
than has had them answered. "


It's being 20 long years. Twenty years of futile search in
this weird planet for my purpose, my objective , my motive
for existence and subsistence. what I have received in
return have been more and more questions. Answers do appear
somewhere around the horizon but they bring with them
another burden of questions. And as such being an
over-inquisitive quizzer, I keep lurking in the dark in the
trail of their answers. In these twenty years, I have seen
a lot of things and shut my eyes to a few... made  friends
with some and bought enmity with some... suffered a broken
heart and mended others... have understood great mysteries
of nature and solved some... drunk the elixir of knowledge
and hidden behind the veils of ignorance... have shot to
stardom on occasions and lost into obscurity for the rest
of the time. It's been such a life that neither can I be
thankful for it nor can I be not thankful for it. The reason
being I haven't known how life looks when seen from outside
my life. I have been me throughout these twenty years and so
don't know what it feels like not being me. What I have
indeed figured out is that we got to make choices in our life.
We cannot ask for the heaven and get to be the sinned ones at
the same time. We have the right to choose what we want or be
thrusted upon a choice that we have to take irrespective of
our needs. It is these choices that totally change our life
and pave our future. It is these choices that decide our
victory or defeat in the game of life. A life of choices...
that is what our lives eventually get reduced to. I have made
some choices in life whose outcomes I still await. Some
choices that I made, though, still ask for justifications. My
pursuit for academics made me force my passion for sports,
music and dramatics to take a backstage. Similar decisions
also made me get reclusive and affected my personal life.
Although I am in a favourable position at present, decisions,
like these, taken by me do still unbalance me. It is not
because I have made some wrong decisions but because every
choice I made won me some rewards in life and bereaved me of
some joys of life. The same is with everyone of us. It's a
pity that even though we have the power of choice, we do not
have the right not to make any choice because by doing that,
it itself would become a choice.

How green was my valley ?

2005-08-14T12:51:00.000-07:00

Well I am back to blogging after a long time. It is not that I had nothing to write but couldn't devote enough time to blog. Well watched Swadesh again and was touched again. A great movie and spectacular performance from an actor whom I hate the most. May be it is my hatred for him (for reasons best kept out of this blog) or his amazing performance that I felt onscreen was a real life person named Mohan Bhargav. I don't see any resemblances between him and me in terms of elementary similarities like his attitude, academics, job etc. but still I found he was conveying some of my feelings throughout the movie. Like Mohan, I try being one of the system yet different from it (what you would rather call standing out of the crowd). Mohan's decision in the end to quit his job in NASA sounds a bit odd and immature but if we look back in our lives, there are many such points when we give up big things to gain small things because those small things attain greater importance in our life than those big things. What Swadesh does is make us realise that and remind us what we are and where we belong. Two dialogues will stand out in my memory for long. The first being - Apne hi paani mein pighal jaana baraf ka muqadar hota hai( it is the fate of ice to melt into its own waters ). The other one being when Dayashankar Pandey compares the actions of the migrating indians as apne chaukhat ka diya giving light to the neighbour's house( the light of one's compound giving light to neighbour's house). Not just dialogues but messages for us to understand our roots and ourselves and help us carve our future. Moreover Mohan's efforts in bringing electricity to his village and then staying over in his village to do more for his village, may seem to idealistic to people but it indeed envisages the very Indianness that makes us so different from others. It highlights the optimism and vision that keeps us going. It reminds us that if there is going to be any revival of our motherland then it will be we who can do it. Yes we... we , the people.

Analyse This ...

2005-04-18T11:03:00.000-07:00

Well India snatches another extraordinary series defeat from the jaws of victory against archrivals Pakistan. Millions of heart broken. A dream shattered. That's what they call the Indian Cricket team. Cricket is such a passion in India that one of the first few things a kid learns early in his life is to play cricket. In a country where a cricket match is as important as a festival, where cricket stars are not only revered and adored but worshipped, the fanataicism of cricket is such that a match featuring India is greatest event of any day not to forget the excellent TRP ratings fetched by them. A country that eats, sleeps , drinks and virtually lives cricket... that is craze of cricket in India. And such disastrous results do not do justice to the passion and dreams of the million cricket loving Indians. Where does the real flaw lie in the much hyped Indian team that cannot even gift a fitting tribute to the coach, who reinstalled the much needed confidence in the team, on his farewell? The answer lies deep inside the way cricket is handled in India. First things first. The selection procedure is indeed flawed. What can you say when a player finds his place in the team just on the virtue of past performances and being the captain. Also when certain players' star stature prevents them from being dropped from the team. Whereas the new players normally get one or two chances to prove their mettle. If they don't perform well, they have wait for ages to get another call. And if they perform well, then they are assured a place for, atleast, the next few series even if they perform badly. Because of this the Indian team normally ends up as a one-man army. Take a look at the best team in the world , Australia. They are a perfect example of team spirit and individualness does not exist as evident from the Darren Lehmann case when he offered to step down so that the back-from-injury captain Ricky Ponting would play. Secondly, the money mindedness of Indian cricketers does affect their onfield proceedings. The numerous endorsements are not expected from the players and it seems they are better off endorsing than playing cricket. It appears shameful when their ads are screened during a match where the team is losing. The performance of Indian team always yields suspicions of match-fixing schemes. After all a team performing brilliantly in a couple of matches doesn't just make a U-turn and start performing this badly unless ,ofcourse ,the match has been fixed. Another element responsible for this bad performance is the media. The way media handles Indian cricket is a crash course in bad management. It is higly illogical to glorify the team on success and then with a single defeat start criticizing that very team. The way media makes a hero out of the players and then suddenly makes them appear as the baddies is real immatureness. Lastly, the greatest culprits of all, are the foolish Indians wasting their times watching cricket. It is the numerous hopes that the people have pinned up that results in this frustration. The over emphasis laid on cricket has sounded a death knell on other sports and made the cricketers take their job for granted. So the best thing that can happen to India is that this terrible defeat opens the eyes of the ignorant mass and they start investing in other things minimising the hyper-addiction to cricket.

Interview with an Atheist

2005-04-17T11:25:00.000-07:00

People call him an atheist. Much isn't known about him. Its still a mystery how people came to know about his ways of life and labeled him as such. The only thing I know about him is that he doesn't like revealing anything about himself. Still I managed to coax him to speak to me. Here is the interview of an atheist:

Me: Its so kind of you for allowing me to interview you. First of all I would definitely like to know why have you been labeled an atheist ?
Atheist: Its quite obvious, I am not a theist.(chuckling)

Me: But then why aren't you a theist ?
Atheist: Because I cannot force myself to believe something that I donot believe.

Me: So you are of the opinion that God does not exist.
Atheist: I cannot say so as I wouldn't say something that I cannot prove. Neither can I say that God does exist because none of us can prove that either.Its just that something existed before we came to being and it still exists having some sort of control on our lives. May be that is what we call GOD.

Me: So you believe there is some universal power above everything .
Atheist: Ofcourse, otherwise the creation of every entity that exists becomes vague whatever scientific theory we give.

Me: Since your belief is quite similiar to the existence of GOD , then why this disbelief in HIM?
Atheist: Because of the way he has been represented. I find it utterly illogical to worship a photo or a stone figure. On one side you claim that God is omnipresent then why do we confine him in to the boundaries of temples, churches, mosques etc ?

Me: It seems your disbelief is more of a veil for your resistance towards the places of worship.
Atheist: Not only that but also against the way various religions have been practised. Something is preached, something comprehended and something put to practice.

Me: Can you tell me something about your hatred towards the concept of religion?
Atheist: See, I have always felt religion to be the greatest hindrance towards mutual brotherhood. Almost all mishaps in the world have been direct consequences of religious discriminations. Be it the Crusades, the Hindu-Mughal feud, the world wars, terrorism in the modern world , all have had religion as one of their ingredients. The Crusades had the Christians and the Muslims battling over whose world it was. The world war-II saw Hitler making life hell for the Jews. The existence of the most of the fanatic terrorist wings has more to do with religion than with anyother thing, be it the Jehadis, the IRA or other such extremists. Even it was religion that was the vital weapon used by the British for their Divide and Rule Campaign in India. I don't think any of the religions preaches such kind of violence. It is only the way religion has been interpreted by the followers or , should I say, the way religion has been taught by the so called teachers of religion that has created contempt in the hearts of people.

Me: So What do you think are the real teachings of religion?
Atheist: I am not sure about that but what I am sure of is that a religion can never teach you to have contempt for another religion.

Me: It is also well known that you have a certain dislike for going to temples?
Atheist: I believe that the supreme power is omnipresent. So going to temple doesn't make any sense. I consider that power as a friend, my best friend. I share all my thoughts and feelings with HIM. So I needn't go to the temple. Moreover the temples remain extremely crowded and that repels me. Also the temples are kept so untidy and unclean. If proverbs are to be believed
then, " Cleanliness is next to Godliness". Any place that is unclean doesn't have God in it. So temples don't have the presence of God.

Me: And what do you have to say about the rituals?
Atheist: I have nothing to comment about it because whenever I have followed certain ritual its under compulsion. I have never felt like appeasing GOD because I hate the total concept of doing something in order to make GOD happy so that your wishes are fulfilled. This is not a barter system and you don't make business dealings with GOD.

Me: A last question, don't you think you are interpreted in a wrong way when people say that your atheism is just a fashion statement.
Atheist: People are entitled to their own views and whenever people say so I laugh at their ignorance. My stand on atheism is logical. I don't challenge the presence of God. I challenge the way God is interpreted and worshipped. I challenge the idol worship and false religious practices that take place in God's name. I challenge the religious discriminations. I am not an atheist by choice but by circumstance. If religion had been practiced in the proper way then I would have been a devotee. I would rather continue my friendship with my "FRIEND UP THERE" then succumb to the ignorant practices of the society.

Food for Thought

2005-04-14T17:09:00.000-07:00

I have believed since long that there is one thing which we possess upon which we have complete authority and no one can steal or take it away from us. It is our imagination - a gift granted to all by "MY FRIEND UP THERE" so that the process of evolution might continue forever on this planet. And I have made it my favourite past time. So when I was having a curious chat with my one of my close buddies about what was in store for the future of the world, we came upon some great ideas. Now the biggest problem MOTHER EARTH has is that of population and storage apart from the diminishing resources. So we found out some curious possible solutions to these serious threats:-
POPULATION
Solution 1: Introduction of a new law banning further childbirths. No more kids means no more new entries to the human community and then we will have a control over the population. If you fail to abide by this law, the father ,the mother and the offspring will be executed.(Demonic Punishment !!!)
Solution 2: Terraforming. Humans will eventually find out a way to colonise the outer planets that would promote life. So that means we will now have transport vehicles plying not only between countries but between planets. If this plan succeeds then the most sought after jobs will be mining and special corps and every individual will be imparted astronomical training.
Solution 3: This does sound impractical but we will start utilising the empty sky above and the ground beneath(underground/underwater) for shelter. Buildings will be constructed in the empty sky(the Jetsons way) and students will start using submarines and personal jetplanes to reach their school!!!

STORAGE
Solution 1:Everything that has become old and outdated will be destroyed. Archiving and Museums will become illegal. Every thing in the world will deal with the present and the future and the things of past will stay only in memories but no real existence.
Solution 2: Hail Terraforming again but with a twist. The outer space will be used not as a residential colony but as a sort of garbage depot. Imageine the moon being a data repository!!!

RESOURCES
Well we couldn't think about it because the seemingly impractical nature of our talk took a toll on us and we felt that it would be better to eat our dinner than analyse this great challenge. Sometimes you start imagining things that seem like fantasy, unreal, virtual... but seldom we understand that these have always been the food for thought, the very fodder of innovation. Well I should conclude here else my friend would say,
" Don't let your imagination run amok ".

A Question of Responsibility

2005-04-11T05:32:00.000-07:00

"With great power comes great responsibility".
These are the lines with which Peter Parker (a.k.a. Spiderman ) brings to end the proceedings of the classic Hollywood flick SPIDERMAN. As classy and adorable these dialogues might sound , they carry the weight of an Old Wizard's wise advice. It's not in possessing great power that we become great, but it is in our greatness to carry on with our powers without misusing them. Well the above have been cited by me in context with the powers vested by MEDIA that has often been misused by them. I have always been of the view that the media be made free from the shackles of governmental authority for its the duty of the media to get the truth out. But there is a thin line between getting the truth out and intruding someone's privacy. And this line has often been crossed by the media. I still remember the day when Princess Diana died (thanks to the paparazzi intent on getting some intimate pictures of the Lady with her boyfriend Dodi-Al-Fayed) . She was a lady I admired and adored not only for being beautiful and gracious but also for being so humane and charitable that even after her death she continues to rule the heart of millions. Her tragic death is just one out of the many cases handled badly the media. Not to forget about the hundreds of divorces yielded by the ever-over-anxious media playing spoilsport with the happily married lives of the CELEBs... As Andy Warhol once pointed out that everyone of us has his share of 15 minutes of fame, the media true to these words raises people to the zenith of stardom only to dismantle their very foundation for the rest of their lives. If this world has to be renovated then it is the media that has to understand it's purpose and set things right. It has to understand the enormous power it possesses and handle it with utmost responsibility.

Are We Alone Here?

2005-04-05T11:12:00.000-07:00

Well the Champ returns back to his writing ways and today he is going to ponder over the billion dollar question - Are we alone in this world? The case in study is why I feel that someone is watching over me although I know that right now I am alone in my room writing down these monolithic pieces of wisdom and when I see behind me the emptiness of the room feels me but as I turn my back and start facing the screen, I again start getting these paranoid feelings. I register a case of mental harassment against that invisible entity. And the detective in me takes up the case convinced that the truth cannot hide forever. I start inspecting the whole of my room for evidences and I get weird signals (as they say) of an ominous presence. The room is in a mess and every single object in my room seems to possess life be it my dirty sport shoes trying to get my attention or the potato in front my PC querying about it's purpose. I try not getting distracted and go on searching the place exactly behind my chair which is supposed to be MR. INVISIBLE thing's hideout. Why was he staring at me anyway and why does he just vanish out of the sight when I looked back. Is he hiding from me or is he stalking me? Well if he is stalking me then he better be careful because the glamorous CELEBs of my world have taught me a lot about handling the stalker stuffs. The pieces of apparels behind me , hung from the string that acts as my closet, seemed to be bystanders sighing down with utmost innocence. And that's were the investigation rounded up to a zero. No more clues ahead. The invisible thingy (as my friend calls it) seemed to have had a plan in his mind that made for a great execution with plenty of stealth put into it. Just when I was about to put down my weapons, I struck gold with my extremely loyal and handy brain coming to my rescue with an seemingly good trap. I sat facing my screen and placed a mirror in front of me and the next time I felt the presence of that thing behind me , he will be caught. Well I can sense that all those reading this, are now patting my back for this great idea and thanks for it. So I waited for sometime but no one really came out from his hideout and this made me feel that it must have been an illusion. But suddenly the thief came out of his den only to be caught by my aquiline eyes. At last, the stalker had been caught and I was elated by this great success. But Mr. Invisible turned out to be a small mouse that ,unknown to me, had been sharing the room along with my other two roommates. He had made my room his hideout/shelter. Good for him. All these great arrangements for catching a mouse!!! Well somethings turn out to be pretty much different from what they appear. The cat and mouse game over, I returned back to my job. But in the back of my mind I still knew what had been caught wasn't my stalker. Something else was still there roaming freely throwing his macabre glances at me. It still is. We are certainly not alone here. And if some other entities do exist then who is intruding whose privacy. They or We?
Well that’s another billion dollar question. Isn't it?

The Magic Of Love or is it?

2005-04-04T07:44:00.000-07:00

The Call of Love is really powerful and it enriches you... or something like it. That's something that I have heard since my childhood. I don't know why God has still made it a forbidden fruit for me till now. But since I am someone who searches for reasons in every aspect of life, how a query like this can remain unanswered. So I went on to search for the reasons by diving into the mysterious last 19 years of my life. Well I did have a lot of crushes but I lost interest in all of them after a few days. And most of them were females whom I could never approach. But I found, my unfortunate case of not falling in love, was not as a result of me being an introvert or of my excessive shyness, but more of a direct consequence of the various real life love stories that I had seen. There was a case when one of my good friends fell for the same girl on whom I had a crush. And people like me who value friendship a lot, did an idiotic blunder (as you may say) by getting out of his way. It's a different story that even my friend was unsuccessful in his attempt which however introduced me to that girl's extremly ugly and dark side. I am thankful for being saved. Then there was another case when I chose friendship over love and became good friends with one of my crushes. But what got me drift away from love were two incidents. The first one involved someone I cared for a lot. What hurt me about the whole episode is that his love created a lot of turmoil in the family. I don't understand how people take side of their lovers whom they barely know and that too against people who have spent their whole lives for them. Well I would never like to be in such a situation. These things are good for a script of a movie but not in real life. How can one be so selfish and ungrateful to the very people who are the masterminds of his creation? It is a different thing that all those problems were later sorted down in his family mainly because of the way he handled it and also because of the cooperation his family members gave. The other incident too was equally eye opening. Because I haven't seen people undergo drastic changes. For good or bad, only the "ONE UP THERE" knows. Years of association takes a backstage to months of romantic greetings.That's what got him to move away from the very persons whose company he could not leave before. Well I am happy for him because he is more happier now than he was before. But after this incident I have had my priorities sorted. I am here to fulfill some sort of objective that I am destined to. My personal experiences have made me think that love is a distraction. I want to live a life like a free bird and not be under the binding chains of my girlfriend. I value my friends and family more than anything and something called "LOVE" will not be allowed to trespass in. So hey, all the girls out there, bad luck for you. If someone objects to my views you are welcome to comment on it and try to enlighten me about where I went wrong. And if you are out there clapping in favour of my views, let me say I love Fan mails. And all those who have been hurt by these statements, I am utterly sorry I can't help, these are my personal views not meant to hurt anyone. Others who are right now extremely angry with me and are wondering why I wrote all these, well I had warned you all, once I start blogging all hell is going to break loose.

Hail The Indians

2005-04-03T10:08:00.003-07:00

Well I am just back from a game of Rise of Nations, and playing as the Indians, have covered the entire world but Japan. And with a move left Japan is about to face an impending invasion from the greatest ever conqueror the world has seen. Games are so cool; they give you the power to realise your dreams and your weirdest imaginations. And they often force you to intrigue yourself with a weird question. Are we the ones who play games or just pawns in a huge game someone "UP THERE" is playing? As vague as the question may sound, it has its own complicacies because if we are indeed pawns in a game, then we have two ways out - complete our objective else face a valiant elimination. Sounds familiar? Am I telling your life's story? Maybe; for, all the things in the world are interlinked and what we see maynot be what they are. There is something mysterious about our existence because we exist as if we don’t exist. Too complex for you to understand? Well everyone isn't entitled to learn the secret of this world and those who learn it are no more part of it. It’s a difficult decision to make - to be part of this virtual world or to know the real world. After all its a matter of which pill you choose that changes your life. And the conclusion is that if I had been you, I would easily conclude that the writer of this piece had just seen ANIMATRIX yesterday and got so much caught in it's enchanting web that he is still to come out of its hold.

And then all hell broke loose...

2005-04-02T11:08:00.000-08:00

Some things change the fate of the world... Imagine what would have happened if Eve hadn't consumed that evil ominous apple, if empires had worked on enriching the world rather than conquering each other's territories, if the Britishers had not invaded India and then India hadn't been partitioned into two, if the world wars had just been confined to the pages of fiction, communal disharmony, terrorism , treachery, wars, corruption ... etc had just been part of dictionary and a remote reality , and what if a rebellious introvert residing in his dream world having a penchant for weird things and dislike for monotonic things had not decided to start blogging... Well the world would have been a better place to live. But since the world isn't one right now, that rebellious introvert has decided that its time to express his views about everything that exists in this world or that had existed once. After all he lives in a country where he has the freedom of expression and expressing your views cost you just a piece of your mind and nothing more. And if you had the courage to read this scrap that came to my mind out of nowhere, then let me assure you more are going to come as he has started blogging and all hell is going to break loose...