Chapter One - A Bad Dream

I was still standing near the railway tracks. The train had long since passed me though ,in the distant horizon, I could still see the smoke fly out of its chimney and the sound of its horn still reverberated in my ears. There was nothing I could do now. I had tried to prevent the dog from moving on to the tracks. It didn't pay heed to me and why should it? I wasn't its master. And then the dog's leg somehow got stuck in the rails. I had seen this from a distance and rushed to its rescue. Try as I may, the leg seemed to have glued to the surface. The dog looked at me giving out wailing pleas for help as if thinking a bigger creature like me could get him out of the torture. No doubt I was a bigger and smart creature than him, but I was equally helpless here. If only someone could explain him that evolution and might have ,sometimes, nothing to do with helplessness. And then to make things worse, a train came into the picture. As it happens normally, in times of trouble, the clock ticks faster. The train sped towards the dog. I stepped away from the tracks while dog kept wailing looking alternately at me and the monster coming its way. Within minutes, the train moved past me, dismembering the poor little creature. I couldn't muster enough courage to look at the tracks. I had tried my best but failed.Sometimes it doesn't matter how hard you tried but whether you succeeded or failed.

Remorseful, I was still standing near the railway tracks. The train had long since passed me though , in a distance, I could still see the smoke fly out of its chimney and the sound of its horn still reverberated in my ears.There was nothing I could do now. I thought this feeling would slowly sink down after all I had just witnessed a death. And a death is a death be it a dog. I didn't understand why I was so upset. It was just an accident. And I had no role in it. The dog was supposedly at the wrong place at the wrong time and probably, destined to die a horrible death. Yes, it was indeed horrible death, seeing death coming your way and being helpless. I don't know why, but the mere mention of the word "helpless" stung like a poison arrow in my heart. Was I helpless? I could have done at least something to rescue it else what is the use of having a high IQ or such great strength. And why was I accusing myself all of a sudden? I did try and I am no superhero that I would succeed all the time. It wasn't I who got the dog on the track and moreover it wasn't my dog. I was in this absurd perplexed state of mind - partly guilt ridden , partly escapist.

Some more time passed. I was still standing near the railway tracks. The train had long since passed me and I could no more see the smoke nor remember the sound of its horn. But ,yes , I couldn't forget the wailing dog's last sight. I wanted to move away but somehow now my legs seemed to have got numb. After some effort I managed to whisk myself away from the dreaded site. I kept walking , along the railway tracks, towards the nearby station but felt like being followed by someone. I turned back to find no one. Again I started walking faster. This time I could hear faint footsteps following me. I dared not look back. As I reached the signal post, I could now see the station. I desperately wanted to reach the station since there would be people around and I would at least be saved from my lonely thoughts. But before I could take another step, I again heard that wailing cry I so dreaded. I couldn't prevent myself from looking back only to find the poor dog staring at me. I was so lost in my thoughts that I forgot I was still standing on the tracks. Suddenly the signal changed and the tracks got rearranged making way for a train to enter the station. And in the process, my leg got stuck in them. I panicked and tried to scream but couldn't as I saw the dog vanish in front of me. I couldn't figure out what had just happened. How did the dead dog appear and suddenly disappear? Or could it be that the dog's accident was just a sign of things going to happen to me? I didn't have time to think over this as a steel monster sped in my direction. I tried to close my eyes but my eyelids refused to obey me. I just waited there for the moment to get over. The train came nearer and nearer and there was a bang after which there was darkness everywhere.

My eyes were still open but it was dark outside. I wondered whether I was in heaven or hell? Unfortunately I figured out that I deserved neither of them, so I was back in my world. I was lying on my bed and in spite of the winter, was sweating profusely as one does after having a nightmare. It had all been a bad dream. And now I was all awake, pondering over whatever remnants of the dream. I couldn't understand the meaning or the purpose of the dream. Such things aren't new to me as most of my dreams are incomprehensible. I have a lot of dreams - good ones and bad ones. My life is built on them and I live either of them. Welcome to my world as I wait for one dream to end and another to start.