Borne Identity

" Some People are born with an identity, others have borne one".


Who am I? This three worded question is one of the toughest ones for me to answer. I have been searching for my identity since the day I understood the basic underlying truth of the world that life is nothing but a race for survival. Identity is the only thing that sets us apart from animals, no matter in whatever ways may we be related to them. It is the only thing that sustains my growth as an individual in this crowded universe and sets me apart from every other entity. I have always tried to establish an identity of my own, that would truly speak of the real me. It's not been that easy though because life does not always propagate you to display the real 'you' to the outside world. These inhibitions are often the call of the time and situation, two essential elements that lay constraints around you. Also sometimes it may so happen that you don't want the world to know why you do certain things. These are the times you need to disguise yourself as someone else. And it is these disguises that veil our real identities. When I retrospect back into my past, I find that I have only at certain junctures shown the world my true identity while most of the times the mask I put on (which the world thinks to be me) is something that even I find a stranger. While there are numerous reasons for this masquerade, it is difficult to enumerate why I have been unable to shed this veil. No doubt this veil has become my identity to the outer world. What is much more of a concern for me is that I seem to have lost the skills I once possessed in handling my disguises as I find myself inquiring about my real identity. The real me seems to have somewhere lost itself in the shrouds of my cloaked identity.

Although as a 21 year old I haven't seen the whole world, yet my experiences have taught me a lot about the how all these work. The various stages of our life have a lot of impact on our growing up. In our pre-teen years we always try to emulate other people, who have influenced us. During the teens and early twenties, when we are suddenly thrusted onto the threshold of worldly existence, we start looking out for carving an image for ourselves. This leads to an egoistic surge for the making of the 'I' different from others that could be easily recognised amongst a crowd. This 'I' predominates all the decisions and choices we make. Later on we start understanding our responsibilities and our family comes into the forefront but the 'I' always stays at the back of our mind. These quite often lead to what we call a duel between us and the whole world termed, pretty aptly, as identity crisis. Often the identity that we carve for ourselves is not the persona envisioned by us. Well indeed some people are born with an identity that they are never able to shed and sometimes don't want to shed it and try to accumulate as much as they can on the basis of these identities. As for myself, I have been building my own for several years and though I seem to have lost myself in the confused whirlpool of the quest for the real me, I believe one day the whole world will actually figure out who I really am. Truly enough, some people are born with an identity, while others have to borne one.